Sacrificial Love: The one in authority is to care for those under him,[1] and in marriage, the husband is to exhibit a lifestyle[2] of sacrificial love. This isn’t a conditional love, dependent on whether their wives deserve it or meet their expectations.[3] This is Christ-like love. As He gave Himself up for the church’s benefit, so the man is to give up his selfishness, a petty give-and-take mentality and give his time, resources, energy, attention, etc. for her benefit. He lives by the Lord’s maxim: “It is more blessed to give than to receive” (Acts 20:35). He adopts the mindset of Christ (Phil. 2:5) and lives as a conduit of joy, blessing, strength and goodness to his wife. Men, love your wives this way!
Church: Paul, once again, deviates from the topic of marriage to speak of the Lord’s love for His church. Here, he pointedly speaks of the purpose of Christ’s sacrifice, both our cleansing from sin (justification) and the holy and blameless lives we offer to the Lord.[4] Christ’s death not only cleansed us from such things as pride, deception, greed, covetousness, thanklessness, rebellion, etc., but His death also catapulted us into the new life (2:10; 4:24) marked by humility, truth, love, contentment, worship, submission, etc. As a bride adorns herself for her groom, we will on that marriage day beautify ourselves with all such righteous acts (which God has wrought in us![5]) for our dear Savior.
[1] Those in authority must care for their subjects (cf. also 6:4, 9). There is no place for abuse and power trips.
[2] The verb “love” is imperfective, as was submission for wives in 5:21. Both describe an ongoing lifestyle.
[3] The role of each spouse is never dependent on the other’s obedience to the Lord (cf. 1 Pet. 3:1). Christ is the reason why the wife and the husband are to fulfill their marital duties (cf. Col. 3:17-19).
[4] The first “so that” describes our positional sanctification (justification) (Acts 20:32; 26:18; 1 Cor. 1:2). The latter two make up a pair and they describe the putting on of something glorious, “the righteous acts of the saints” (Rev. 19:7-8), which points to progressive sanctification (Rom. 6:19-23; 1 Thes. 5:23; 2 Tim. 2:21).
[5] Our righteous deeds are the result of God’s gracious work in our lives (John 3:21; Phil. 2:13; 1 Cor. 15:10).